Embracing JOMO (Joy Of Missing Out) instead of FOMO

Especially when browsing social media, it was hard for me to not feel wistful envy sometimes when I saw the events or meet-ups or creative projects others were involved with. I'd get anxious, telling myself I wasn't working hard enough, just be doing more, should shift my energies and attention to somewhere else.

I still go through that on occasion, of course, but am much better at embracing JOMO instead - the Joy Of Missing Out. Longtime blogger @anildash.com came up with this term back in 2012, and there have been variations since.

Here are the elements of JOMO (or my own interpretation of the term) that have helped me the most:

Being intentional with my time, whether it's on my own or spending time with a friend.

Avoid wasting time and energy worrying about what others are doing or thinking.

Be better at saying "No." This can be especially challenging if the person is someone I like and/or the cause is a good one. What I've learned: No one knows my full context (e.g. all the other people and causes in my life I am already involved in helping, the personal challenges I am already facing myself) except for ME. I need to put on my own oxygen mask first. I learned this the hard way, when I found myself unfairly snapping at friends and family, then realizing that it was up to me to set boundaries.

Be aware of how and why I am using social media. Some out there might be thinking at this point, "See? That's why I don't use it at all!" I strongly believe that we each need to decide what's best for our own mental health. In my case, I actually DO enjoy many aspects of social media. I've been delighted and fascinated by online communities since before the term "social media" existed. More on this in another post.

I think it's easier for introverts to embrace JOMO than extroverts, though I'm sure there are exceptions. For me, JOMO is about taking time to reflect, being more deliberate about where I put my emotional energy and time, and limiting how much time I spend scrolling social media feeds. One reason Bluesky is my favourite social media platform is because it's SO much easier to control what I see and don't see.

I posted over on my One Thing I've Learned blog on pckt.blog about the related image below.

For more about me and my work, see https://debbieohi.com/

For more ATmosphere bloggy goodness, see https://debbieohi.com/links/